Skip to content


Usually, when I am able to successfully FLIP something, I feel an immediate sense of relief. Savor that sense of relief and see if you can find things for which to be grateful. Start off with being grateful for your ability to shift your perspective.

Often I find humor in the fact that I was taking myself so seriously in the first place.  Feel free to laugh with yourself.

“Humor can alter any situation and help us cope at the very instant we are laughing.
- Allen Klein

Once you feel that sense of relief, really power up the positive. Find things to be grateful for. Gratitude is the number one happiness strategy. Other opportunities for powering up the positive are:


Cultivating optimism. Optimism is expecting a desirable future, that good things will be abundant and bad things scarce. One great technique is to write a Best Possible Selves Diary. Sit in a quiet place and take twenty to thirty minutes to think about where you expect your life to be one, five or ten years from now. Visualize a future for yourself in which everything has turned out the way you’ve wanted. You have tried your best, worked hard, and achieved your goals. Now write down what you imagine. Think of this as the realization of your life dreams, and of your own best potentials.



Practicing kindness. Doing a kindness often relieves guilt, distress, or discomfort over other’s difficulties and suffering and encourages a sense of awareness and appreciation for your good fortune. Another benefit of practicing kindness is its impact on your self-perception. When you commit an act of kindness, you may begin to view yourself as an altruistic and compassionate person. This new identity can promote a sense of confidence, optimism and usefulness and jump-start a cascade of positive social consequences. Is there a kindness you can extend to someone involved in the situation? Allow your intuition to guide you to committing a random act of kindness such as paying for someone’s parking space, lending a hand to a neighbor, or simply holding the door for someone.



Nurturing relationships. The value of supportive family and friends is consistent in all the happiness research I’ve done. Fredrickson says, “The tie between flourishing and enjoying good social relations is so strong and reliable that scientists have called it a necessary condition for flourishing.” Is there a relationship with your current circumstance that needs a little TLC? If so, here are some suggestions. First make time for the person, second express sincere appreciation, admiration or affection and thirdly, manage any conflict in a non-conflictive manner.




Mining the Gold
The FLIP IT! process can also provide an opportunity for deeper psychological work. To continue with Mining the Gold click here